Friday, June 25, 2004

Rate my baby.

Hi, according to this site I'm the ugliest baby on earth!

There are plenty of Rate My (fill in your own noun) sites out there, but I just today encountered a site for Rate My Baby. There are quite a few sites of this nature, so I feel compelled to comment. Now, I can see a Rate My Kitten or Rate My Puppy because after all the animals can't just get on the internet and surf around...if they're the lowest scoring cat or pup, they won't mind. (As a matter of fact, the lowest scoring animal is usually just a person dressed up as an animal anyway.) I know what you're thinking...."Babies can't go on the internet." You're right. Babies CAN'T surf the web by their own volition. However, in a good 5 or 6 years they'll be old enough to start searching for the Rate My Such and Such sites, only to be greeted and stunned by their own picture. Can you imagine how sad that would be for a 10 year old kid to stumble upon his own photo on a Rate My Baby site and see that he was rated as the ugliest baby ever entered? I know that wouldn't probably happen, but it's a sad thing to think about. Mothers need to ask themselves, what GOOD will it do to put this picture up? At least if you present your baby to family and friends in real life, they will lie and say it's just about the cutest little person they've ever seen. Computer users, behind their shield of anonymity, are not so kind. They will be ruthless. They will say that the best-looking babies are ugly just to throw off the votes. They will post nasty things about your children. WHAT GOOD WILL COME OF THIS? If you really need that much reinforcement about your child's looks, just give it a few years...your kid will be 10 times uglier than it was when you started. Almost every child goes through an awkward phase from about 7-12 years old where you will wonder what the hell is wrong with them. Just keep that in mind, and keep telling yourself that babies always looks like wrinkled old men. Oh, and always remember: sure babies are miracles and all, but no one gives a shit about your own but you.

I know that no one else gives a shit ABOUT me,
but nobody told me they might give a shit ON ME!

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